One-on-one meetings or 1:1s often get relegated to project check-ins, turning into a tedious ritual that neither managers nor engineers look forward to. However, when done intentionally, they become powerful opportunities to strengthen relationships, uncover challenges early, and cultivate professional growth.

Rethinking the Purpose of 1:1s

Too often, 1:1s focus on status updates or immediate blockers, which can alienate engineers looking for more impactful dialogue. Instead, these sessions should center on career aspirations, personal well-being, and ways to improve team dynamics. This approach shifts the meeting from transactional to transformational.

Structuring Conversations for Depth and Trust

A well-designed 1:1 agenda balances open-ended questions with active listening. Here are practical elements to include:

• Career checkpoints: Ask about goals, skills they want to develop, and potential roadblocks.
• Well-being check-ins: Gently inquire about workload, motivation, and signs of burnout.
• Feedback exchange: Encourage a two-way feedback loop to build trust and continuous improvement.
• Project reflections: Discuss recent wins and challenges, but without dominating the meetings focus.

Questions That Unlock Insight

Sometimes managers arent sure what to ask beyond the usual Hows it going? Try these targeted prompts:

• “Whats something youre excited about right now?”
• “Is there anything blocking your progress that we havent talked about?”
• “How do you feel about the support and resources youve been getting?”
• “Can you name one skill or area you want to grow in the next few months?”
• “Is there anything making you feel stressed or overwhelmed?”
• “How can I be a better manager for you?”

Spotting Burnout and Disengagement Early

Subtle changes in tone, reduced enthusiasm, or vague answers can signal burnout or disengagement. By cultivating a safe and open space during 1:1s, managers create the conditions for engineers to share these struggles before they escalate.

Follow-Up Is Key

Growth-driven 1:1s dont end when the meeting does. Document key points and action items. Revisit them in subsequent sessions to show youre invested in your engineers development and well-being. This continuity fosters accountability and trust over time.

Make 1:1s a Priority

Blocking regular, uninterrupted time signals to your team that they matter. Avoid rescheduling or rushing these meetings, even amid heavy workloads.

Conclusion

When approached with intention and care, one-on-ones transform from routine checklists to essential growth opportunities. By structuring meaningful conversations, asking thoughtful questions, and following up diligently, managers unlock the full potential of their teamselevating engagement, preventing burnout, and accelerating career growth.